Opening Pandora’s Box of the Family Secrets

Did you dare to open the lid of a painful past and are now sitting with the aftermath of its contents?

Perhaps you can relate to Pandora. According to Greek mythology, Pandora was created by Hephaestus and Athena as part of a plan to punish humanity. Pandora’s Box was actually a jar as told in Hesiod’s poem “Works and Days” which is the most well-known version of the story. Zeus gave Pandora the jar as a gift. Pandora was unaware that the jar was filled with evils from the gods and opened it with curiosity, despite being warned not to. What was released from that jar was all the evil, sorrow, and misery that were stored inside. While this version does not contain hope that remains behind and presents us with a very bleak view of the world, other versions offer the possibility of hope. This story has many parallels to the Biblical story in Genesis of Adam and Eve who were created by God. Similar themes of temptation by curiosity, feelings of guilt and shame, and consequences resulting in pain, hardship, and suffering for humanity are also narrated.

At CARE Counseling, we want to get curious and expand our knowledge. Curiosity is a good thing. Curiosity can also bring up face-to-face horrific realities of the suffering of humanity. There is so much pain within families, communities, and around the world that it can feel like evil is everywhere: hate crimes, terrorism, genocide, and suicide to name a few.

It can be difficult when one discovers a shocking family secret that releases sorrow and misery. Strong emotions of anger, fear, confusion, loneliness, and sadness are challenging without any means of containment. If you are a fan of True Crime and Murder Mysteries, this is a whole new experience when you are living out a nightmare. Maybe you were the one who uncovered the Pandora’s Box within your family or your relationship. Histories of all the things families like to keep the lid on– physical or sexual abuse, incest, prostitution, drug use, financial lies, infidelity, or time spent in prison are impossible to stuff back into a neat little box. Chaos is released along with all the emotions.

It is OK to allow someone to support you along this process as you sort through and unpack the contents that have been strewn all over the place. We don’t need to talk about anything if you are not ready. When you feel comfortable, an empathetic ear is available. A trained mental health therapist has tools to share with you to work through traumatic stressors, cope with emotions, and help provide containment for your distress. I believe that there is hope, amid the pain and suffering.

Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC